In which I take my Greek mythology obsession up a notch:
Major Project 1
​For Major Project 1, I chose to adapt a project of mine from high school into a pitch bible for a TV show. The original project was a thematic analysis of four feminist Greek mythology retellings. In my adaptation, I created a pitch for a modern TV show inspired by the stories of the women in the four novels. The pitch bible took the form of a Canva-style presentation.
Revision Plan
My Major Project 1 started off as most of my first drafts do, slightly scattered and with too much information. In my peer review session, I got some really valuable feedback that helped me make my project more visually appealing and easy to understand. The biggest piece of feedback I received was that my character pages (as well as some of my other pages) were way too long, with too much text. I totally agreed with this feedback, so in my revisions I took a much different approach, turning my characterization paragraphs into character bios, broken up into smaller, more digestible sections of text. I also broke up the synopsis page into two pages and adjusted some of the spatial arrangement to be less crowded. These changes all served to make the pitch easier to understand and more pleasing to look at, which enabled me to better communicate my message. One other piece of peer feedback I got that I disagreed with was that the names and stories were a little too complicated/true to the original myths, and that they could be changed to be more palatable. While I recognize how the names and stories could be slightly more complicated than people are used to, I ultimately disagreed with this feedback. Even though this show that I was pitching takes place in modern times, I still wanted to blur the lines in terms of time a bit and view the show as a modern telling of these timeless myths, so I kept the names and stories.
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My final instructor feedback said that I should work to gear my pitch to a more specific audience, adjust my spatial arrangement a bit more, and use a more consistent pitch tone throughout. I agree with all of this feedback, and if I were to revise this pitch bible further, I would take it all into account. I would specify my target audience more specifically as primarily women, from teenagers into adults. By specifying my audience more, I could tailor the pitch and the show in general to be more appealing and enjoyable with that subset of people. I would adjust my tone throughout the pitch not only to be more targeted to this audience by also to be more consistent throughout. I have some really great moments tonally (see image below), but making the tone more consistent and engaging throughout would make the people reviewing the pitch bible more interested in producing the show.
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Overall, if I were to revise this project again, I would focus on polishing the pitch and making it more appealing to my audience. I’d make my tone more consistent throughout, and really focus on trying to sell the idea for this show. I’d also continue to adjust my spatial arrangements on my slides, to make sure all elements have room to breathe, and the slides don’t look crowded or intimidating. The more time I spend working with Canva, the easier it becomes to use. Finally, I’d just build the pitch out more. I’d create a mood board for the show, something that was suggested to me in peer review but I didn’t do because of time constraints. I’d also flush out the episode plans a bit more and create a timeline for production. All of this would make the pitch more appealing would help convince my audience to create this show.
I'd edit to maintain this kind of tone throughout the pitch.
A snapshot I created of what a mood board for this show would look like.